Tuesday, September 11, 2007

FIELD TRIP: The Cocks went down to Georgia

...on an afternoon train to Georgia.

What better place to kickoff the 2007 season (no offense to Louisiana-Lafayette last week) than in what might be the epitome of "Southern Football"...Athens, Georgia. It was a beautiful, hot, sticky SEC Saturday, and the University of Georgia did not disappoint. All of the stereotypes were out in full force...the rabid rednecks, the sloppy drunks, and the uniformly-attired ladies.

Yep, it's a Georgia game.

Fun with onomatopoeia.

Scattered amongst all the tailgating were signs that we were still traipsing around a school of higher learning. Or at least a place that masqueraded as one the other six days of the week. This is, after all, the place that made a science out of meat.

Is there a Doctorate of Meatology?

Is this where they keep their large animals or their large animal trailers? Either way, it's tenaciously guarded.

After surviving the long walk to Sanford Stadium (and a gracious Bulldog tailgate that wickedly tried to subdue their enemies with free beer), we finally made it into what has been immortalized in song as...

...the Cesspool of the South.

Questions of culture aside, there is nothing quite like a game down Between the Hedges. It doesn't have the free spirit of LSU or the ear-splitting roar of The Swamp, but Georgia just oozes Southernness...for good or bad. It's just a fun place to watch a football game. Especially when your offense wastes little time in marching towards the end zone.

Penetrate, penetrate, Cocks stick it in.

A quick Cory Boyd scamper later, we were up 7-0. Little did we know, that would be the game's only touchdown. And ultimately, the deciding one.

But scoring touchdowns isn't the only problem that plagues the Bulldog nation. A quick glance at the ad boards led to a shocking discovery.

Wait a second, does that say...?

Wow...I'm impressed by Georgia's openness and willingness to address the needs and concerns of the transgendered members of the Bulldog nation.

What? Oh...I get it...SEATEXchange. Sorry, after a steady diet of alcohol it looked a little like something else.

Speaking of genitals, the Bulldogs had theirs surgically removed by the Cocks all game long. And by the end of the game, we had rolled up an ugly win...but a win nonetheless.

I caught this in the two or three seconds before they took it down.

Cocks storm the field.

We left the stadium victorious, leaving behind a UGA team that has lost five straight SEC East games. The neutered Bulldogs were left to themselves, pondering the emasculating defeat at the hands of the Cocks, and perhaps contemplating a visit to seatexchange.com.

"Mommy, the big, mean Spurrier man did it to us again."

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Great work Doc, I enjoy your work and understand your twisted sense of humor...

VR,

TurboPropCock

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